Monday, May 7, 2012

Silly Foolish Girl (Alessandra Post)


35, BC Volterra Italy

“Maybe you will get your wish in the end. When Aro reads your silly little mind and discovers your secrets. . . perhaps he will decided you cannot be trusted and are not worth. . . I would vote for your execution, certainly. We do not need unwilling guards, nor do we need foolish little girls. Aro’s obsession with new, shiny gifts is downright ludicrous.” Caius said in a voice so full of hatred that I simply had to stare at him for a moment.

Silly and foolish? Me? I thought glaring at him for a moment, silent in his arms. I was hardly silly and foolish. I was a Priestess of Vesta. Did he not know who he was talking too? If Caius had been anyone else, I could have had him put to death the moment he dragged me out of Rome. I could have had him put to death for simply laying a finger on me.

However as it was, he was not just anyone, and while his words cut my pride like the knife that had killed my brother, I simply had no more energy left in me to fight him off.

Perhaps he was right. Perhaps this Master Aro of mine, would see how stupid his ideas of keeping me against my will was. And if he didn’t? If he didn’t see how stupid and silly it was, than I would find a way to kill myself before he was able to turn me. I would never become a monster as he was.

I felt angry tears sting my eyes and not for the first time wondered what I had done to displeased the Gods so. Yet I knew I what I had done. Perhaps I had been a silly foolish girl to break my vows of chastity. Was this to be my punishment then? A life of immortality as a monster? As a general rule, a Vestal who was found to have broken her vows was murdered. I had always thought the vows of chastity were stupid. How could vowing to be chaste help you grow closer to the Gods? For even the Gods had slept with one another? So why was it so wrong that their priests and priestess’ should not do the same?

I had never felt so in adept to control my own life as I did at that moment. Why did the Gods have to be so cruel? I wondered slightly cursing them. I closed my eyes, hating the idea of becoming a monster with every step that Caius took.

Perhaps, Master Aro would feel that I wasn’t trustworthy enough for the task. Why should he? He would take me against my will and turn me into something I did not want too be. How could he trust me when he knew I did not want to be a vampire? What made him think I would obey him? What made him think I would honor his wishes?

I made a silent promise to myself that if, if I did become a vampire, I wouldn’t like it. I would never be happy and Master Aro would become even more of an enemy than I saw him as. And one day, one day I would get my revenge on the lot of them. If it took two thousand years, I wouldn’t care how long it took. I would one day, die. This I was certain of. Because surely to die would be the greatest revenge on Master Aro. And if I couldn’t die, than I knew that one day I would leave the Volturi. I just didn’t know how.

But at the very given moment, the one thing I wanted most in the world was death to wrap her arms around me and sweep me off to Hades.

************

Caius tossed me to the floor of a great, round room with pillars holding it up and tiny windows so high that the sun could surely not make it into the room. I screamed in pain as I felt my ankle twist and bit my lip staring at the granite beneath me. Tears streamed down my face as I looked at the sandaled feet of Master Aro. I slowly lifted my eyes to meet his.

“You caused her to twist her ankle.” Marcus said standing up and glaring at Caius. I looked back over my shoulder and cringed as Caius shrugged.

“She deserves far worst.” He spat pulling me up to a standing position. I fell to the ground the moment he let go twisting my ankle even farther, and I knew I would not be able to runaway again for some time on a twisted ankle. I cried out hitting the ground.

“Please Vesta, do not punish me farther for the crimes that I have committed against you.” I whispered as Master Aro knelt to the ground and gently lifted my chin. I only wish to die, why can you not at least grant me this? I added silently to the Goddess wondering if she was even listening.

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